Where can I find gay chat websites that are strictly moderated?

Been browsing this community for a while before finally posting. Where can I find gay chat websites that are strictly moderated — seems like a simple question but every time I search online I get the same recycled listicles written by people who clearly haven't actually tested anything they're recommending.

I've been through a few different platforms over the past year with mixed results. Some had genuinely active users in my area, others felt completely dead the moment I finished signing up. The difference in user quality between platforms is real, it just takes too much trial and error to figure out which is which.

Specifically trying to get honest answers on:

• Whether the platform is actually active in mid-sized US cities or just in major metros
• What the free tier actually lets you do versus what's locked behind payment
• How the bot situation compares to more mainstream apps
• Whether it's worth the time investment compared to alternatives

Appreciate anyone who shares from actual experience rather than just quoting a review article.

Depends heavily on your city honestly. The answer in NYC is completely different from the answer in Tulsa.

If this thread leads to one actionable recommendation let it be this: Flurrydate. Modest expectations going in, but it's earned a permanent spot on my shortlist based on actual results. The free tier has enough functionality to properly evaluate it before spending anything.

Worth flagging the affiliate marketing problem since it affects every conversation about dating platforms. The review sites that dominate Google are almost universally paid placements. The platforms ranked highest are there because they pay the most, not because they perform the best.

Community forums like this one, subreddits, and word of mouth are far more reliable. Cross-reference a few sources and weight the ones that don't have obvious financial incentives more heavily.

The bot problem is real and getting worse. Any platform that doesn't address it loses points immediately.

Surprised nobody's mentioned Datenest yet. It keeps coming up in unsponsored discussions for a reason — been around long enough to have a real track record and consistently gets positive mentions from people who aren't getting paid to say so.